Santa
December 24, 2007
EXT. LAPLAND – DAY
Santa is talking to a reindeer.
SANTA:
Ho ho ho!
Santa’s smile suddenly fades.
SANTA:
Does that sound false?
He makes an obvious effort to smile.
SANTA:
Ho ho ho!
He grimaces at his poor attempt at jollity. The reindeer is disinterested.
SANTA:
It’s hard to get into the spirit of it. I’ve been doing this for so long, that’s all. I know it’s a good job really, I know I make the kids happy and all that, but still… I feel… empty. The doctor prescribed anti-depressants. Not sure they make much difference really. I think I’ve kind of forgotten what it’s all about. It’s lost its meaning. I give little Bobby his Nintendo and Ella her Bratz doll, they don’t even seem grateful. They have so many toys already and think its their right to get more, more, more. It makes me want to give up. I sometimes think I can’t be bothered.
Santa starts to load a sack onto his sleigh.
SANTA:
But I have a job to do. Best just get on with it.
INT. CHRISTMAS LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
Santa is putting something in a stocking. He sees a mince pie on a plate, and next to it there’s a glass of whisky. He very deliberately squashes the mince pie, then he downs the whisky.
INT. CHRISTMAS DECORATED LIVING ROOM – DAY
A boy and a girl reach into their stockings, watched by their parents. At first it seems their stockings are empty, but then they find something right at the bottom.
MUM:
What did you get?
BOY:
Vouchers?
GIRL:
A book token! How much is yours for?
BOY:
Thirty. Bah! Lets see what Gran got me…
Under the tree they check out a big pile of presents. In a chair next to the tree Santa is slumped in a chair. It appears that he’s unconscious, with whisky spilling down his red suit.
Santa sits up, he’s suddenly awake, he starts playing with a Nintendo DS.
BOY:
Hey, that’s mine.
SANTA:
Haven’t you heard of sharing?
MUM:
Would you like to share lunch with us?
Santa smiles.
INT. DINING ROOM – DAY
Santa is sharing Christmas lunch with the family. The boy has just pulled a Christmas Cracker and is reading the joke.
BOY:
Why does Santa like to work in his garden? Because he likes to…
Santa laughs, a ‘Ho ho ho,’ and everyone smiles.
